2020 Gratitude

My sweet Molly passed away in June and my life went down hill from that moment on.  Willow and I wandered through the days wondering if the grief would ever give us respite.  She refused to go in the car because the last time Molly went into the car she did not return.  She looked for her in all their favorite places and slept in their crate surrounding herself with all their toys.  I often felt her asleep on my lap reached down to pet her before I remembered.  I sometimes hear her bark or see her out of the corner of m y eye when Willow and I are walking on the Foodhills Trail.  It has been a difficult time.
I went through a series of illness, some requiring hospital visits, some just managing ongoing issues. 
My car died a week after Molly left and I was without transportation until August when my wonderful ex-husband and two grown children surprised me with a 2005 Mazda CX7.  I was still too sick to drive, so since Tiffany was taking care of all the chores, I loaned it to her. 
My New Year's Eve resolution was to find, in all my sorrow, a grateful heart.  Each day I wake up and write something in my journal for which I am grateful. 
Tomorrow is the last day of January 2020 and my gratitude journal has every page filled.  I included my almost eight happy years with Molly and ended this  month with apples, my favorite fruit. 
Big Blue (my car's nickname) is back in the driveway and I am on the road again. I have had nearly two weeks of good health and am managing on my own again. I am hoping for a better year than last year but good or bad I will face it, endure it and learn it's lessons with a grateful heart.